The popularity of online dating is picking up.
Apparently some people are going on five or six dates a week thanks to online dating. Some people even go on three or four dates a night.
These serial daters know what they want in a partner, so they give each of their dates a 20-minute in-person interview. And when that person turns out to not be the one, it is out the door for them.
Can you really screen people that quickly? Doesn't romance take time to grow?
If you go through dates so quickly, won't you be too cynical to know when the right person comes along. Yeah, sure that person might like dogs, and you cats. But still if given a chance . . . it can go somewhere. Can't it?
Since when did dating become like a job interview? Can love really be found that way?
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9 comments:
My answer to all the questions is NO. You won't find love by going through dates like that. People are complex beings, granted some are more than others. You need to take time to know a person (history, present, mind, and soul). That's why these people are called serial daters. They'll spend a lot of time going from one date to another and no one will be good for them. Because to them, who wants to stay with one imperfect person (as we all are) when you have someone else in the line up? Next!
Love is not a job interview.
I think you sure can eliminate a bunch of people in short periods of time. It's like going out to a bar and approaching someone that seems interesting to you over all of the other people in the bar. I don't even think the extra time it takes to interview each person (versus scanning a room and choosing someone) is a waste of time because you might make a great friend or find someone to set up with a friend.
Of all the people in the world, what makes one stick out to you more than others? who knows!!! but if this is the way some people go ahead and do it... more power!
Speed dating is very popular, and those people only have three minutes apiece.
I agree with Pink Oyster. The serial daters become snobs. They are looking for the perfect man or woman... but perfection isn't real.
Relationships are work. It takes time for a person to grow on you.
You can have standards. But then again you don't know what you will like for sure until you try it on.
MJ,
Yeah you can eliminate people in a short time, but at the same time you have to give someone a chance.
And if you start serial dating, you risk becoming cynical and jaded.
Coatman,
As much as I think you should try speed dating... it is a bit superficial in the sense that three minutes is not enough time to get to know someone. You begin eliminating people for silly reasons when choices start coming at you so fast.
I think you will only have major dissappointment if you throw all hopes and dreams into finding THE ONE through speed dating or online dating... whatever.
That will happen with any dating, though. I've never had a relationship start when I was actively searching for one.
I'm just saying..If you do these things with an open mind, I'm sure it can be a lot of fun! Ya never know!
pink oyster is right on about serial daters. I've come across a lot of these types doing this online experiment. I don't know about speed dating, I just don't see how it's possible to meet someone that way. I have dated a few nice people I've met online so it can be done. I don't see how it's any different than meeting someone at a bar. In fact I think it's better. There is no alcohol involved ;)
pgh,
Yes, you can meet nice people while online dating, I suppose.
I would say it's a little different than meeting someone at the bar. The Internet can be a little less inhibiting perhaps... a little quieter and, as you say, more sober.
But like I said, you have to give a person an honest chance. Meaning beware of the superficial serial daters.
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