Just not that into you...

Social situations can already be awkward and complicated enough in real life, but taking them into the virtual world makes them even more so.

Take Facebook for instance. You write a question on someone's wall and, through the "news feed," all your shared friends can see you wrote that question. Then that question just hangs there unanswered. The friend, you wrote the question to, has logged on since. You know this because you can see they've commented on other people's walls. You, however, are being ignored by them.

Do you take this personally? Are they deliberately snubbing you? Do they not feel your question relevant? Do they just not have the time to answer? They've had the time to write back to other friends and maybe even upload photos onto the site.

They wouldn't have ignored you if you had asked the question in person. That's just plain rude.

Do social networking sites, which are supposed to bring people closer together, encourage rudeness, given the impersonal nature of such sites?

Given that you're snubbed on Facebook by a friend, what does that mean for your friendship with that person? If they can't make time to answer your question, maybe they're just not that into you, because your true friends will write back right away.

And what to do with those friends who are not that into you? Do you just not bother to make time for them. Certainly, you won't be asking them any more questions on Facebook, because it's no fun being ignored.

Bringing friendships into the virtual world is complicated.

On backwards and inside out...

"Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty." - Sicilian Proverb

I once went a whole day wearing a shirt inside out, and it was on backwards. It was the kind of shirt where it would have been pretty obvious to anyone I met. Yet, no one, not even my friends, told me. When I got home and saw how I was dressed, I was completely embarrassed I had been out in public looking that way. (Sometimes, if I'm running late, I don't have time to look in the mirror before I step out the door).

According to the Sicilian proverb, does this mean I have no "real" friends?

mySpace and Facebook

At the urging of some friends, I decided to finally set up a Facebook account and mySpace account.

It's amazing who is on those sites and who isn't. There are people you want to find, but aren't there, and those you haven't talked to in 15 years. And if you haven't talked to someone in years, it's like should you really invite them to be your friend.

There's no need to go to my 1o-year high school reunion now. I think I just went. Wow. What a time killer these sites can be.

Visit me at mySpace here.

Friendship

"The only way to have a friend is to be one." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Friendships are a lot of work. It's very easy to get wrapped up in the here and now of your own life and lose touch with a friend.

And it's easy to assume that everyone already has their own life and isn't interested in hanging out with you, but you don't know until you ask.

According to Life's Little Instruction Calendar Volume XI: "The words, 'Would you like to join me for coffee?' can result in one of the greatest romances of all time." I would add to that friendships as well.

Just Friends

When a guy complains that he is in the friend zone, he must ask himself is he really in the friend zone? Or is he just sitting on his hands, afraid to act?

Has the girl been laying subtle hints that she likes him? Is he just too dense to notice?

Speak up boy. Express how you feel. If she doesn't feel the same way, she'll end the teasing friendship and you'll get over it.