The meaning of life.

I've been thinking about living life to the fullest lately and what that really means. To live a full life, do you have to live to the extreme--travel the world, sky dive, bungee jump, cure AIDS, and I don't know what else?

How much do we let fear rule our life and prevent us from following our dreams? How many artists are just hobbyists because they are scared to take the plunge into their craft professionally? "That's just not practical," some would say. How many people are government paper pushers, begrudgingly? For what, a large paycheck? Does money really mean anything if you're chained to a desk your whole life?

How am I holding myself back? That's the question I'm asking myself these days. What is it that I really want to do with my life?

The Real Environmentalists.

There is such a stigma against dumpster divers--the people who dig the pop cans and scrap metal out of back alley garbage bins. But these people are another one of society's unsung heroes.

Dumpster divers reuse and recycle for lazy people who can't be bothered. I think such lazy people should be paying the dumpster divers more than the 10 cents deposit for each bottle. It's a lot of work to sort through the trash to reduce the amount of waste someone else is sending to the dump.

On backwards and inside out...

"Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty." - Sicilian Proverb

I once went a whole day wearing a shirt inside out, and it was on backwards. It was the kind of shirt where it would have been pretty obvious to anyone I met. Yet, no one, not even my friends, told me. When I got home and saw how I was dressed, I was completely embarrassed I had been out in public looking that way. (Sometimes, if I'm running late, I don't have time to look in the mirror before I step out the door).

According to the Sicilian proverb, does this mean I have no "real" friends?

A league of one's own

Have you ever seen the movie Shallow Hal?

It's about a superficial ugly man who only wants to date pretty women. Eventually, he learns that beauty is more than skin deep and falls in love with an obese woman because of her personality.

Sure, looks aren't everything, but I think this movie is saying more: that ugly people should date within their own league. To go after good looking people will only lead to rejection and disappointment. It shows good looking people as shallow and only able to love other good looking people. According to the movie, only ugly people have depth.

By trying to break down stereotypes, as this movie claims to do, it only enforced more stereotypes. The movie would have been more challenging to our societal views if Brad Pitt had the lead instead of Jack Black, I think.

Unforgettable poetry

I am reading an old Harper's Magazine from 1999. There's an article in it where five well-established American poets talk about poetry.

According to these poets, (Donald Hall, Cynthia Huntington, Paul Muldoon, Heather McHugh and Charles Simic) a poem is considered great if, once you are finished reading it, you want to go back and read it again.

A good poem should be disappointing, or deflect one's expectations, says Huntington.

"If a poem has no obvious destination, there's a chance that we'll all be setting off on an interesting ride," said Muldoon.

"I think one of poetry's functions is not to give us what we want," said McHugh.

To me then, poetry is like Joss Whedon's Buffy the Vampire Slayer. There are so many unexpected plot twists in that show, and characters you least expect die.

The trick is to be able to think differently than your audience. Become a mind reader and anticipate their thoughts. It's tough.

Driving, Ms. K.A.

I didn't have a car until I was 24-years-old, which means I had to mooch a lot of rides.

I always figured when I finally did get a car, I would offer rides to any friend in need. But now that I have a car, I realize how annoying it can be to drive other passengers around.

People are inconsiderate. They leave garbage in my car--pop cans, used tissues and a number of other disgusting items. If my car were messy, maybe this would be allowable, since I likely wouldn't notice. But my car is ridiculously clean, so it actually drives me nuts.

To be polite, I keep my music turned off when I have a passenger, since I can appreciate that not everyone likes the Beastie Boys. However, some passengers feel the need to turn on my stereo, unasked, and then dig through my glove compartment, also unasked, and flip through my CDs and complain about my taste in music. I think this is outrageous.

I also hate it when people invite you somewhere and then expect you to drive. My rule is: if you invite someone, you drive. Agreeing to meet at a location is also acceptable. I hate it when I get invitations like this: "Are you going to the rock concert? If so, it would work really good for me if I could get a ride with you?" Way to make a person feel used.

Trends

“Great things are not accomplished by those who yield to trends and fads and popular opinion.” - Jack Kerouac

That's not funny.

There's a video going around of a toddler who runs on stage during a break dancing show.

Long story short, the break dancer accidentally kicks the child in the head while doing a back flip. The child is knocked unconscious as a result.

The message on the subject heading of the e-mail I got read "funny." At first, I wanted to laugh, but then I was like: "No, that's not actually funny. That's a real person that got hurt."

It's interesting that we, as a society, find accidents funny. Talk about adding insult to injury. So remember, the next time you slip on ice and break your wrist, you might end up as an Internet joke, thanks to some jerk with a camera.

Life is funny.

It's interesting where life takes us. What we never thought would happen to us in a million years sometimes randomly happens.

Like last year, I watched a few shows referring to the Napa Valley--Sideways and Sex and the City. Then, one day, I accidentally ended up there on an unplanned trip. (It's a long and uninteresting story).

Or I recently started watching The Amazing Race and then one day I inadvertently meet the show's host. (It's a long and uninteresting story).

Of course, there are bad things that you never thought would happen to you in a million years too, like when I did some damage to my car by hitting a water-filled pot hole. (It's a long and uninteresting story).

Life is funny.

Doom and gloom

"Like the frog swimming in water that starts to boil, drip by drip, we get used to it," said author Joy Kogawa about how Earth is dying without causing alarm to the human race.

I think we have the "can't happen to us" disease. Sure, there's global warming, but it won't wipe out the human race. We're invincible.

I'm sure the dinosaurs didn't see it coming either.

Knees

Occasionally you meet a guy who makes your knees weak. He distracts you with his presence. And you always have to watch him out of the corner of your eye.

He, of course, seems to take no interest in you at all.

I hate that.

The drunken cat.

I took my cat to get her teeth cleaned today.

Although she tends to get gingivitas, I sometimes wonder if getting her teeth cleaned is worth the trouble.

For one, animals don't have their teeth cleaned in the wild.

And two, after my cat's teeth cleaning, she is so doped up, it's unsettling. She stumbles around my apartment, bumping into furniture, before finally hiding under the bed. I feel bad for putting her through that.

Right now, I'm just waiting for my cat to return back to normal.

Thinking it out.

It’s always good to step back from your crushes for a brief moment.

Sometimes it turns out you don’t really like the person. It is just there have been so few options in your life lately that you’re practically ready to jump on any new eligible male who comes into your life, even if he is dull and boring or a total jerk. You can blind yourself to his flaws just so you can keep an open option for yourself, which is the only option you might have at the moment.

An awkward moment.

I was in the bathroom today (what are the odds?) when the woman in the stall next to me had her cellphone go off.

To my surprise, she answered it. From what I could gather, it was a business call from her boss.

The bathroom had one of those automatic flush toilets, so I was like should I get up and reveal to her boss her location? Would that be considered poor bathroom/cellphone etiquette?

But when she started going through her agenda and scheduling meetings, I was like, I can't sit here forever. So I got up, let the toilet flush and blew her cover.

Grey Matter

Dating would be easier if you could keep things black and white. He forgets to call. It’s over. He says something inappropriate. It’s over.

If he doesn’t have a university education, you don’t go out with him. If he lives with his parents, you don’t go out with him.

If it were that easy, there would be no emotional messes.

But then again, you probably would never go out with anyone. And if you did, your relationship wouldn’t last a month.

There needs to be room for exceptions and forgiveness—the shades of grey.

But it’s the shades of grey that bring the heartache.

I spy . . .

I am really amused by the fact that the U.S. Defense Department thought Canadian "poppy" quarters contained radio frequency transmitters. (You know which quarter I'm talking about--the Remembrance Day commemorative one with the red poppy in the middle).

I can just imagine the American military contractors looking down, with horror and excitement, at the quarter staring up at them from where they found it, in the cup holder of their rental car. Finally, it was their childhood spy fantasy coming true.

Their discovery sparked a false espionage warning. Damn Canadians and our funny money. Serves us right for making commemorative quarters.

And p.s., this is why investigative journalism is important. It brings us important stories like this one. Good work Associated Press.

A little crush...

Do you ever have those crushes you shouldn't have?

Like the person is a total geek, but for some odd reason you are strangely attracted to them?

Or the person is a total jerk . . .

Sometimes our hormones go against our nature.

mySpace and Facebook

At the urging of some friends, I decided to finally set up a Facebook account and mySpace account.

It's amazing who is on those sites and who isn't. There are people you want to find, but aren't there, and those you haven't talked to in 15 years. And if you haven't talked to someone in years, it's like should you really invite them to be your friend.

There's no need to go to my 1o-year high school reunion now. I think I just went. Wow. What a time killer these sites can be.

Visit me at mySpace here.

Tough love.

Can we ever begin to really understand love?

The ancient Greeks had four different words that meant love.

"Eros" was one of those words. It refers to erotic, sexual love.

"Storge" refers to family love, like the love between a parent and child, or perhaps between a husband or wife.

"Philia" is the third word for love. It speaks of a brotherly affection that one might have while in a deep friendship or partnership.

"Agape" is a love that loves without changing. It is a self-giving love that gives without expecting repayment. It is a love so great that it can be given to the undesirable. It is love that loves even when rejected. Agape love gives because it wants to.

So perhaps, when it comes to our so called soul mate, we will love them in all four of these ways. And if we don't, then maybe they are not our soul mate.

Bad Timing

Have you ever had a crush on a guy? You hung out with him many times. You did everything you could to show him that you were into him.

It was like you were dating him, except he didn't know it.

And then you gave up and moved on. Disgruntled towards him, you decided you dislike him. You now despise his habits you thought were so cute. He gets on your nerves. You break up with him in your head.

Then, finally, he decides to like you. But you've decided you don't like him at all. You wouldn't date him now. His very presence makes you ill.